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Feed Better. Feel BetterÂŽ

No Shame. No Blame.
Just a Reflexive™ approach
that helps feeding
feel better.

I’m Avery—a lactation consultant, educator, and founder of Reflexive™ Feeding. I help families and professionals make sense of feeding struggles by looking at what’s underneath: reflexes, regulation, and real-life bodies.. 

Because feeding should feel good. For both of you.

Feed Better. Feel BetterÂŽ

No Shame. No Blame.
Just a Reflexive™ approach
that helps feeding
feel better.

I'll help you make sense of feeding challenges by looking at what’s underneath—reflexes, regulation, and real-life bodies.

Because feeding should feel good.
 For both of you.

You did everything ‘right’… so why does feeding still feel so hard?

 

You planned, you prepared, you did the research. But nothing prepares you for just how hard latching and feeding can actually be. The pain, the stress, the self-doubt.  I know exactly how it feels—because I’ve been there, too. My journey into lactation support didn’t start in a classroom—it started in the trenches of painful, frustrating feeds with my own baby.

 

And just like you, I just wanted to get it right.
But nobody had answers that made sense. So I went looking for them.

You did everything 'right’… so why does feeding still feel so hard?

 

You planned, you prepared, you did the research. But nothing prepares you for just how hard latching and feeding can actually be. The pain, the stress, the self-doubt.  I know exactly how it feels—because I’ve been there, too. My journey into lactation support didn’t start in a classroom—it started in the trenches of painful, frustrating feeds with my own baby.

 

And just like you, I just wanted to get it right. But nobody had answers that made sense.

So I went looking for them.

I quickly realized I had to
find the answers myself. 

 

That’s what led me to become a lactation consultant—because once I finally found what worked, I couldn’t keep it to myself. I had to share what I’d learned with other parents who were just as desperate for real answers.

And it wasn’t just the professionals who didn’t have the right solutions—my friends, family, and the people who loved me wanted to help, but their advice didn’t work for my babies. It wasn’t their fault—they were relying on the same outdated guidance that had failed me.

At first, I thought I was alone. But the more parents I talked to, the more I realized we weren’t failing at feeding—feeding was failing us.

I wasn’t just navigating feeding struggles—I was navigating a system that wasn’t built for parents like me: parents with intense babies, larger bodies, or challenges that didn’t fit the standard advice.

That’s when I realized: if feeding was going to feel better—not just for me, but for every parent struggling—I had to rethink everything. So I did.

I quickly realized I had to find the answers myself. 

That’s what led me to become a lactation consultant—because once I finally found what worked, I couldn’t keep it to myself. I had to share what I’d learned with other parents who were just as desperate for real answers.

And it wasn’t just the professionals who didn’t have the right solutions—my friends, family, and the people who loved me wanted to help, but their advice didn’t work for my babies. It wasn’t their fault—they were relying on the same outdated guidance that had failed me.

At first, I thought I was alone. But the more parents I talked to, the more I realized we weren’t failing at feeding—feeding was failing us.

I wasn’t just navigating feeding struggles—I was navigating a system that wasn’t built for parents like me: parents with intense babies, larger bodies, or challenges that didn’t fit the standard advice.

That’s when I realized: if feeding was going to feel better—not just for me, but for every parent struggling—I had to rethink everything. So I did.

It Didn’t Happen Overnight.

Becoming a lactation consultant didn’t magically solve everything.

The more I learned, the more I realized that parents were being given outdated advice—not because professionals didn’t care, but because they were working with the only information they had.

At first, I followed the same advice I’d been taught. But it led to the same results—the same pain, the same struggles. Feeding was still hard, and no one seemed to have real answers, including me.

Was this really the only way?

It Didn’t Happen Overnight.

Becoming a lactation consultant didn’t magically solve everything.

The more I learned, the more I realized that parents were being given outdated advice—not because professionals didn’t care, but because they were working with the only information they had.

At first, I followed the same advice I’d been taught. But it led to the same results—the same pain, the same struggles. Feeding was still hard, and no one seemed to have real answers, including me.

Was this really the only way?

 

I almost gave up. Several times. But instead, I went on a mission to find a better way.

My background in Biology and years of teaching science had trained me to question, test, and refine. The scientific method wasn’t just something I taught—it was how I thought.

So, I went deep.

I dug into infant reflexes, brain development, and feeding mechanics—testing what actually worked.”

I wasn’t satisfied with solutions that worked once—I needed something that worked consistently, for every baby and every family.

I almost gave up. Several times. Instead, I went on a mission to find
a better way.

My background in Biology and years of teaching science had trained me to question, test, and refine. The scientific method wasn’t just something I taught—it was how I thought.

So, I went deep.

I dug into infant reflexes, brain development, and feeding mechanics—testing what actually worked.”

I wasn’t satisfied with solutions that worked once—I needed something that worked consistently, for every baby and every family.

What I discovered changed the way I approach feeding forever.

What I discovered changed the way I approach feeding forever.

Then one run changed everything.

I wasn’t buried in research when it hit me. I was out on a run.

As I replayed everything I knew—reflexes, anatomy, feeding mechanics—it clicked: the chin wasn’t just guiding position. It was triggering a reflex that was key to latching outcomes.

Back in my office, I experimented. Babies latched more easily. Feeding got smoother. Parents exhaled.

But the deeper shift came later. When feeding felt better, everything felt better—tension, second-guessing, the whole emotional weight of it.

That was the real discovery: helping feeding work meant supporting both nervous systems—not just technique, but connection.

One run changed everything.  

I wasn’t buried in research when it hit me. I was out on a run.

As I replayed everything I knew—reflexes, anatomy, feeding mechanics—it clicked: the chin wasn’t just guiding position. It was triggering a reflex that was key to latching outcomes.

Back in my office, I experimented. Babies latched more easily. Feeding got smoother. Parents exhaled.

But the deeper shift came later. When feeding felt better, everything felt better—tension, second-guessing, the whole emotional weight of it.

That was the real discovery: helping feeding work meant supporting both nervous systems—not just technique, but connection.

Why Reflexes Were Just the Beginning.

I realized that touching a baby's chin triggered a reflexive response to open their mouth—wide. And it didn’t just happen once. It happened over and over again. Baby after baby. That’s when I knew.

This wasn’t random. It was a reflex.

The reflexive response I was taught was wrong. Stroking down a baby's lips didn’t cue them to open—it cued them to suck. That’s what leads to pain and damage. So I started testing what I’d discovered—turning theory into real-world results.

And it worked—latch pain ended. Immediately.

But that wasn’t the whole story. Fixing the latch helped, but it wasn’t enough. We had to quiet the stress, rebuild trust, and bring both bodies into it. The reflexive approach did all of that. It helped parents feel more grounded. It gave them a framework they could see, feel, and trust.

We can fake confidence on the outside.
But our bodies, and our babies? They feel the truth.

Without that real connection, even the best technique won’t hold. But when confidence returns—when connection is restored—everything shifts.

Why Reflexes Were Just the Beginning.

I realized that touching a baby's chin triggered a reflexive response to open their mouth—wide. And it didn’t just happen once. It happened over and over again. Baby after baby. That’s when I knew.

This wasn’t random. It was a reflex.

The reflexive response I was taught was wrong. Stroking down a baby's lips didn’t cue them to open—it cued them to suck. That’s what leads to pain and damage. So I started testing what I’d discovered—turning theory into real-world results.

And it worked—latch pain ended.
Immediately.

But that wasn’t the whole story. Fixing the latch helped, but it wasn’t enough. We had to quiet the stress, rebuild trust, and bring both bodies into it. The reflexive approach did all of that. It helped parents feel more grounded. It gave them a framework they could see, feel, and trust.

We can fake confidence on the outside.
But our bodies, and our babies?
They feel the truth.

Without that real connection, even the best technique won’t hold. But when confidence returns—when connection is restored—everything shifts.

This doesn't have to feel so hard. 

You’ve probably already tried the tips, the tweaks, the tricks. Maybe they helped a little. Maybe they didn’t touch the root of the problem. And maybe—deep down—you’ve started wondering if something’s wrong with your body. Or your baby. Or both.

It’s not you. It’s that what you’ve been taught wasn’t built for your body. Or your baby’s reflexes. Or your nervous systems. When those get missed, even the best advice can feel like more pressure.

That’s why this isn’t just my story anymore—it’s a new way forward for you. One that looks at what’s *actually* happening for everyone in the feeding relationship, not just what’s “supposed” to work. Where the latch works because the nervous system does.

You deserve a feeding journey that doesn’t feel like a fight. And it’s absolutely possible.

This doesn't have to feel so hard. 

You’ve probably already tried the tips, the tweaks, the tricks. Maybe they helped a little. Maybe they didn’t touch the root of the problem. And maybe—deep down—you’ve started wondering if something’s wrong with your body. Or your baby. Or both.

It’s not you. It’s that what you’ve been taught wasn’t built for your body. Or your baby’s reflexes. Or your nervous systems. When those get missed, even the best advice can feel like more pressure.

That’s why this isn’t just my story anymore—it’s a new way forward for you. One that looks at what’s *actually* happening for everyone in the feeding relationship, not just what’s “supposed” to work. Where the latch works because the nervous system does.

You deserve a feeding journey that doesn’t feel like a fight. And it’s absolutely possible.

You Deserve Feeding Support That Makes Sense.

Whether you’re sorting through latch pain, trying to make sense of what’s working and what’s not, or just need someone to help you connect the dots—there’s a way forward.

This is a space for real bodies, real problems, and real questions—held without shame, without blame, and without the pressure to get it perfect. Just clear answers, grounded in reflexes, nervous system support, and real-life feeding relationships.

You can explore my blog for expert-backed answers. Go deeper with the expanded access pass if you want the full story—what to do and why it works. Or you can join me live and ask your questions in real time.

Reflexive Feeding™ isn’t just about latch technique—it’s about restoring confidence, rebuilding trust, and helping you feel safe and supported in your body, your choices, and the way you want to feed your baby.

You don’t have to figure this out alone.

Your  Feeding Support Should  Make Sense.

Whether you’re sorting through latch pain, trying to make sense of what’s working and what’s not, or just need someone to help you connect the dots—there’s a way forward.

This is a space for real bodies, real problems, and real questions—held without shame, without blame, and without the pressure to get it perfect. Just clear answers, grounded in reflexes, nervous system support, and real-life feeding relationships.

You can explore my blog for expert-backed answers. Go deeper with the expanded access pass if you want the full story—what to do and why it works. Or you can join me live and ask your questions in real time.

Reflexive Feeding™ isn’t just about latch technique—it’s about restoring confidence, rebuilding trust, and helping you feel safe and supported in your body, your choices, and the way you want to feed your baby.

You don’t have to figure this out alone.